Indeed, delaying a child’s initiation of alcohol-use is proven to reduce likelihood of alcohol-related harm in later life. Studies now show that young people who begin drinking before the age of 15 are four times more likely to develop alcohol dependency than those who wait until 21. Each additional year of delayed drinking onset reduces the probability of alcohol dependency by 14 per cent. They also show that those who started drinking before 15 years are also four times more likely to experience major depression in the young adult years. Parents must therefore take good care of their children, setting clear boundaries during the vulnerable early adolescent and adolescent years.
In fact the real challenge is for parents to ‘hold the line’ and to lovingly communicate their position on using drugs and underage drinking and to help their children develop a healthy respect for alcohol.
I firmly believe that you can teach and model what is safe and low risk drinking and think that the new Australian Drinking guidelines are a wonderful tool for parents in this regard.
They recommend that for children under 18 years of age not drinking alcohol is the safest option.
They also state that “children under the age of 15 years of age are at the greatest risk of harm from drinking. For this age group not drinking alcohol is especially important and for young people 15-17 years of age the safest option is to delay the initiation of drinking alcohol for as long as possible.”
For adults they say, “The lifetime risk of harm from drinking alcohol increases with the amount consumed.” They therefore recommend that “For healthy men and women, drinking no more than two standard drinks on any day reduces the lifetime risk of harm from alcohol related disease or injury”.
When they look at the amount consumed on any given occasion they state “on a single occasion of drinking the risk of alcohol-related injury increases with the amount consumed. For healthy men and women, drinking no more than four standard drinks on a single occasion reduces the risk of alcohol-related injury arising from that occasion”. I believe that if we as a community were to take seriously these guidelines and apply them we would start to see a real sea-change over the next few decades. Just as we have seen societal change with regard to wearing seatbelts, ‘safe sun sense’ and smoking.
“While the current drinking age here in New Zealand is 18 years of age this is purely arbitrary in terms of young people’s readiness to assume the “reins of life”.
In reality most parents allow a gradual easing of parental controls for variable periods of time before the young person reaches 18 [eg “You may have one glass of champagne at a family wedding and you decide when you will have it.”]
Indeed parental influence continues beyond 18 in most families. It is this period of gradual transfer of control during which the relationship shifts from being parent- child to adult — adult, when parents most often flounder on limit setting around alcohol. One of the key things in helping our children to develop ‘insight’ around the issue of drugs and alcohol is to help them understand that alcohol and drugs change people — they change the very essence of who you are. For example the police youth aid officer said “The ‘little darlings’ who leave home at 6pm on a Saturday night become violent, aggressive and ugly when filled with booze and drugs”.
Psychologist Dave Riddell says, “Insight is what protects people — not will power. Just say “no” or exhortations to “be good’ won’t work. We need reasons — good reasons to protect us from ourselves.” We want to influence their hearts so that eventually they will willingly choose healthy, mature behaviour. A lot of evidence shows that where there is a supportive parent — child relationship, parental disapproval of alcohol use has been correlated with a lower incidence of later adolescent drinking and reduced influence by the drinking patterns of the peers.
However this appears to have the most influence prior to adolescence. Once a regular consumption of alcohol has been established, regular drinking by siblings and friends has been shown to have more influence and so this is when enhanced parental monitoring is required.
While this is tricky when they want to be more autonomous and demands to conform to peers are increased, teenagers need and want adults to help them ‘jump the maturity gap.’ They want to be seen as adults-in-training, learning to take responsibility for themselves and others.
One of the key influences on young people is the context of the family and the relationships within that, particularly between the teenager and their parent/s.
Within a strong, supportive relationship parents who role model low-risk alcohol use and disapprove of and delay the onset of their children’s drinking, reduce the likelihood of alcohol misuse by their young people. A wealth of evidence shows that children rise to the expectations of adults who love and care for them. n
(In part three, Ms Milne will continue to look at the role of parents, as well as community in helping to stop teens from drinking at an early age.)
l Jennie Milne has worked as a family coach for parents of teenagers at Parents Inc.
